Posted on September 10, 2009 by MeMyself&Who
I think I figured it out today, where I went “wrong” (see the clip). The one “wrong” thing I did.
I trusted.
I think I’m slowly learning to live with that. It feels so horribly slow though sometimes, I get so frustrated with my trust issues. It hurts and it’s scary but slowly I’m learning trust is [...]
Filed under: Dissociation, Dissociative, Dissociative Identity Disorder, Multiplicity, Therapy, Trauma, Triggers, abandonment, abuse, complex PTSD, covert, family, sexual assault, sibling | Tagged: abandonment, abandonment issues, childhood abuse, covert abuse, Dysfunctional family, female abusers, friendships, overt abuse, relationships, sexual abuse, sexual assault, sibling abuse, Therapy, Trauma, trust, women abusers | 3 Comments »
Posted on July 29, 2009 by MeMyself&Who
**could trigger Dark Alters, SI, general anger at everyone, mother shit, oh cursing possibly**
Pretty sure Dth is back. So We’re shit up a creek if he really is. not sure how he got out.
sorry typin one handed because well….
Pretty sure we’re dead. Yup can’t feel so gotta be dead. still bleed…it was an accident…but dont [...]
Filed under: Dissociative Identity Disorder, Mom, Multiplicity, SI, Self-Injury, Verbal abuse, abandonment, defective, family | Tagged: anger, blame, Dark Alter, death, emotional neglect, mother, punishment, self-worth, SI, worthlessness | 2 Comments »
Posted on July 28, 2009 by MeMyself&Who
I was going to say no pants since my brain doesn’t wear pants…that I’m aware of.
Anyway, back from my therapy session and there is so much to say. The problem is me though…my brain is killing me! One of the really hard parts for me is wanting to learn and my insiders wanting me to [...]
Filed under: Dissociation, Dissociative, Dissociative Identity Disorder, Mom, Multiplicity, PTSD, Self-Harm, Self-Injury, Therapy, Trauma, abandonment, abuse, adoption, complex PTSD, defective, family | Tagged: Dissociative, DID, multiple, multiplicity, abandonment, abandonment issues, adoption, adoption issues, C-PTSD, complex PTSD, Dissociative Identity Disorder, EMDR, inner parts, PTSD, mapping | 2 Comments »
Posted on July 23, 2009 by MeMyself&Who
Lots of times I wonder just what the hell I did wrong to get the response I did from my family. Lots of times I think maybe I’m just blowing things out of proportion, lots of times I think that’s what others will say too me. I don’t talk about things because I get the [...]
Filed under: Dissociation, Dissociative Identity Disorder, Internal Conversations, Mom, NPD, Narcissistic Personality Disorder, Self-Injury, defective, family | Tagged: anger, caring, Dysfunctional family, emotions, family, feeling, feeling crazy, mom, mother, Narcissistic Personality Disorder, Support | Leave a Comment »
Posted on June 9, 2009 by MeMyself&Who
Well, that was fun. I woke up this morning thinking about everything that went on a few months ago with my mom and how my therapist was going to help me with a letter but I ended up not doing it cause I had until this morning numbed out my anger. [...]
Filed under: Brother, Dissociation, Mom, Therapy, Trauma, abandonment, abuse, adoption, defective, family | Tagged: "Ordinary People", anger, blame, chaotic family, Dissociation, Dysfunctional family, emotional abuse, emotional incest, emotions, family, feeling, frustration, self-esteem, self-worth | 2 Comments »
Posted on May 10, 2009 by MeMyself&Who
Well, I wanted to sleep in but my allergies decided to attack me instead. So here I am hoping this allergy medication would knock me back out again and instead I find myself dwelling on the day, getting into things I shouldn’t. I don’t know why I do this to myself, get into things that [...]
Filed under: Dissociative Identity Disorder, Just life, Multiplicity, SI, Self-Injury, Trauma, Triggers, abandonment, adoption, defective | Tagged: DID, adoption, adoption issues, complex PTSD, cycle of abuse, Dissociative Identity Disorder, emotional abuse, feeling, Self-Injury, Dysfunctional family, feeling trapped, "normal", competition, competing, rejection, hopeless | 1 Comment »
Posted on May 10, 2009 by MeMyself&Who
I’m one of those survivors having a tough time with this weekend. I suppose I’ve always been mixed up about this day but I think most of the time my feelings got blotted out/ignored. A few years ago I started to realize how hard this Mother’s Day (Mothers) thing is for me because I have [...]
Filed under: Holiday, Mom, Therapy, Trauma, abuse, adoption, covert, family | Tagged: adoption, adoption issues, anger, chaotic family, covert abuse, emotional abuse, emotional incest, emotions, family, feeling, memories, mother, mothers, Narcissistic Personality Disorder, female abusers, confusion, Dysfunctional family, sibling rivalry, sibling abuse, guilt, Mother's Day, competition, competing | Leave a Comment »
Posted on April 30, 2009 by MeMyself&Who
* Ugh! I started this Tuesday and have been so tired I didn’t finish. Don’t quite know why I start a post then don’t finish or feel like it’s not important so it ends up going to the draft monster!
Therapy was really interesting today. Talked about a few things that have been on my [...]
Filed under: Dissociation, Dissociative, Dissociative Identity Disorder, PTSD, Therapy, Trauma, abandonment, abuse, adoption, defective | Tagged: abandonment, abandonment issues, abuse, adoption, adoption issues, basic needs, books, C-PTSD, defective, DID, Dissociation, Dissociative Identity Disorder, fear, feeling, human needs, inner voices, needs, numbing, reading, recognizing needs, sexual abuse, signs of abuse, signs of trauma, Therapy, Trauma, trust | 4 Comments »
Posted on April 16, 2009 by MeMyself&Who
I’ve been back from my appointment for several hours now and I’m just dead. Feels, once again, like there are so many things from the last few weeks I wanted to say but they always end up getting pushed back for something more urgent. I had a few things I wanted to talk to my [...]
Filed under: Body memory, Dissociation, Dissociative Identity Disorder, Flashback, Multiplicity, PTSD, Therapy, Trauma, Triggers, abuse, adoption | Tagged: DID, discussion, abuse, ACOA, adoption, adoption issues, anger, chaotic family, cycle of abuse, Dissociation, Dissociative Identity Disorder, family, feeling, inner parts, mom, mother, secrets, sexual abuse, Therapy, Trauma, Triggers, Dysfunctional family, adult child of an alcoholic, feeling trapped, walls, elephants in the room, questions | Leave a Comment »
Posted on April 11, 2009 by MeMyself&Who
Holy…I was reading through some old post/comments wow I cannot spell for sh!t! haha! Anyway, I never did that post on guilt did I? I can’t remember very well the last time I posted, seems like I always have something I want to post and then I get ‘distracted’. I got distracted on the way [...]
Filed under: Boundaries, Dissociation, Dissociative Identity Disorder, Multiplicity, Therapy, Verbal abuse, abuse, adoption, covert | Tagged: ACOA, adoption, adoption issues, anger, Boundaries, covert abuse, cycle of abuse, Dissociative Identity Disorder, emotional abuse, emotional incest, inner parts, memories, mom, mother, parents, relationships, secrets, sexual abuse, sexual assault, Support, switching, Therapy, Dark Alter, adult child of an alcoholic, feeling trapped | Leave a Comment »
