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Slightly nervous that a certain phone call came into the house and a message was maybe left about a certain medical study I applied to. I don’t think they would have left details but I’m feeling really scared maybe they did. All I know is my mom said there was a message on the machine [...]
Filed under: Uncategorized | Tagged: abuse, covert abuse, disclosing, Dissociative Identity Disorder, emotional abuse, family, mom, mother, privacy, secrets, Support | 2 Comments »
**could trigger Dark Alters, SI, general anger at everyone, mother shit, oh cursing possibly** Pretty sure Dth is back. So We’re shit up a creek if he really is. not sure how he got out. sorry typin one handed because well…. Pretty sure we’re dead. Yup can’t feel so gotta be dead. still bleed…it was [...]
Filed under: abandonment, defective, Dissociative Identity Disorder, family, Mom, Multiplicity, Self-Injury, SI, Verbal abuse | Tagged: anger, blame, Dark Alter, death, emotional neglect, mother, punishment, self-worth, SI, worthlessness | 2 Comments »
Lots of times I wonder just what the hell I did wrong to get the response I did from my family. Lots of times I think maybe I’m just blowing things out of proportion, lots of times I think that’s what others will say too me. I don’t talk about things because I get the [...]
Filed under: defective, Dissociation, Dissociative Identity Disorder, family, Internal Conversations, Mom, Narcissistic Personality Disorder, NPD, Self-Injury | Tagged: anger, caring, Dysfunctional family, emotions, family, feeling, feeling crazy, mom, mother, Narcissistic Personality Disorder, Support | Leave a Comment »
I’m having a difficult moment. The day has been really rough. This is really the most present day I’ve had since last Tuesday and right now I’m trying to just find that little hiding niche right now because I’m just so exhausted from today. The last few minutes have been really difficult due to mom [...]
Filed under: family, Mom, Narcissistic Personality Disorder, NPD, Self-Injury, SI, Therapy, Trauma | Tagged: anger, basic needs, co-fronting, dysthymia, emotional abuse, emotional neglect, emotions, feeling trapped, grief, guilt, insanity, mom, mother, Narcissistic Personality Disorder, sad, Self-Injury, self-worth, SI, Support, switching, Therapy, Trauma, upset, Verbal abuse | Leave a Comment »
I’m one of those survivors having a tough time with this weekend. I suppose I’ve always been mixed up about this day but I think most of the time my feelings got blotted out/ignored. A few years ago I started to realize how hard this Mother’s Day (Mothers) thing is for me because I have [...]
Filed under: abuse, adoption, covert, family, Holiday, Mom, Therapy, Trauma | Tagged: adoption, adoption issues, anger, chaotic family, competing, competition, confusion, covert abuse, Dysfunctional family, emotional abuse, emotional incest, emotions, family, feeling, female abusers, guilt, memories, mother, Mother's Day, mothers, Narcissistic Personality Disorder, sibling abuse, sibling rivalry | Leave a Comment »
I’ve been back from my appointment for several hours now and I’m just dead. Feels, once again, like there are so many things from the last few weeks I wanted to say but they always end up getting pushed back for something more urgent. I had a few things I wanted to talk to my [...]
Filed under: abuse, adoption, Body memory, Dissociation, Dissociative Identity Disorder, Flashback, Multiplicity, PTSD, Therapy, Trauma, Triggers | Tagged: abuse, ACOA, adoption, adoption issues, adult child of an alcoholic, anger, chaotic family, cycle of abuse, DID, discussion, Dissociation, Dissociative Identity Disorder, Dysfunctional family, elephants in the room, family, feeling, feeling trapped, inner parts, mom, mother, questions, secrets, sexual abuse, Therapy, Trauma, Triggers, walls | Leave a Comment »
Holy…I was reading through some old post/comments wow I cannot spell for sh!t! haha! Anyway, I never did that post on guilt did I? I can’t remember very well the last time I posted, seems like I always have something I want to post and then I get ‘distracted’. I got distracted on the way [...]
Filed under: abuse, adoption, Boundaries, covert, Dissociation, Dissociative Identity Disorder, Multiplicity, Therapy, Verbal abuse | Tagged: ACOA, adoption, adoption issues, adult child of an alcoholic, anger, Boundaries, covert abuse, cycle of abuse, Dark Alter, Dissociative Identity Disorder, emotional abuse, emotional incest, feeling trapped, inner parts, memories, mom, mother, parents, relationships, secrets, sexual abuse, sexual assault, Support, switching, Therapy | Leave a Comment »
I was browsing around for some new books and thought I’d check and see if there is anything from the Sidran Institute I wanted (my therapist has been copying stuff for me to read each week out of “Growing Beyond Survival” I like it a lot but little too $$ for me right now). Well, [...]
Filed under: Dissociation, Dissociative Identity Disorder, multiplicity, Therapy, Trauma | Tagged: Childrens books, Dissociation, Dissociative Identity Disorder, free book, info links, mother, multiplicity, parent | Leave a Comment »
