First EMDR Processing Session, “Birth” of an Other & Update

So, long time, no write. Yeah, it’s been busy for me working, planning out my life, therapy, life drama, etc.  I’m looking through my drafts box here and WHOA! There are several things I’m not sure I posted but look like I should have.  I’ll have to sort that out some other time though.  I [...]

Where I went “wrong”

I think I figured it out today, where I went “wrong” (see the clip).  The one “wrong” thing I did. I trusted. I think I’m slowly learning to live with that. It feels so horribly slow though sometimes, I get so frustrated with my trust issues. It hurts and it’s scary but slowly I’m learning [...]

Layers Upon Layers of Onion

I’ve mentioned to a lot of people that I’m super curious about how other multiple systems work. It’s just so fascinating to me how we can be so different from one another and often so similar having never met, having never talked to a soul about our world until we got into therapy or met [...]

Little bit more EMDR

Well someone else asked about this and I know I meant to update my own experiences so I thought I’d try again using the explanation I  gave this person as a jumping off point.  Here is what I said with a few tweaks thrown in to explain how DID fits in there (I was explaining [...]

Can I trade in my mother?

I’m having a difficult moment.  The day has been really rough. This is really the most present day I’ve had since last Tuesday and right now I’m trying to just find that little hiding niche right now because I’m just so exhausted from today.  The last few minutes have been really difficult due to mom [...]

My Mental Vacation

I’m having a pretty nice break at the moment from just about everything.  My therapist says I’m in the rest stage of living with trauma, or something like that.  It’s frustrating sometimes because I am so not in touch with certain feelings.  I mean don’t get me wrong it’s nice to be happy and content [...]

Feeling a Little Run Down

Just popping in to update somethings real fast. Added some more links. 2 was all I was up for, sorry. Updated my About Me slightly. Got hit with a third trauma nightmare last Tues morning. Was the worst one yet. Talking about it in therapy was weird. Got my medical tests over with yesterday afternoon.  [...]

Therapy – The right fit

I started to write a response to a post by Dr. Kathleen Young on What Makes a Good Fit in therapy and realized I was gonna get pretty wordy.  I don’t usually do this kind of thing and actually I think I kind of wrote about it on my “Into the Darkness” blog on LiveJournal [...]

Failing to heed basic needs

* Ugh! I started this Tuesday and have been so tired I didn’t finish.  Don’t quite know why I start a post then don’t finish or feel like it’s not important so it ends up going to the draft monster! Therapy was really interesting today. Talked about a few things that have been on my [...]

Another Tuesday

I’ve been back from my appointment for several hours now and I’m just dead.  Feels, once again, like there are so many things from the last few weeks I wanted to say but they always end up getting pushed back for something more urgent.  I had a few things I wanted to talk to my [...]